Mesh Production

Maybe it's a sabbatical

Deleting all the songs and throwing away CDs
Discarding my Bibles, devotionals, hymnals

I forgot how much we had grown apart
Can't remember the red letters
The ones that use to speak to me
Can't remember when I was devout enough
To pray, believe, hope, have faith

Songs that spoke volumes don't any longer
Words that use to urge me, bore me,
If you're up there, omnipotent, omniscient and all
I think you already know that I don't care

It was beautiful to believe that you existed

It was a marriage and I was the Bride, the church

You had died for, sacrificed for,

Maybe it was based on conceit

I think, all along there was an inkling

In the crevices of my mind

Divorce, annulment, and nutcase in the works

It was a beautiful conversion, but now it is no longer

The marriage was a sham, like many relationships

We got together; it was great, made it work

Then life returns and people change

You weren’t the one I had married all along

It was a fad, socialization possibly

You pleased my parents and I was deliriously happy

The flame burned out

The truth allowed enlightenment

Never mind, it wasn’t a sabbatical

I don’t know what I was saying

Maybe I will walk smack into you one day.

Like my father likes to tell me,

Theologically, politically, and philosophically

The mesh has unraveled to make something new.